Yack it out.

The fine art of talking has always eluded me. It has made me land in deep shit, sound rude when all I meant was a joke, sound over indulgent, sound over friendly and has led to create a lot of misconceptions about me and of course at times made me look too available.

But the thing that I don't get is, whats wrong? And whatever is wrong, is it wrong with me or the way people think? Am I blameworthy in the statues of the world?

I sometimes blame the place I was educated in. 

Sometimes myself for being carefree.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm a helpless desperate asshole of some kind.

What ever the scenario, I have just realized that my thinking capacity is not at the level where I think it should be. 

The fault actually I think lies with the trauma that I was born too lively. And the liveliness that's a part of me is giving me loads of trouble keeping off people and things. 

I just fuckin' don't seem to get how to be formal and friendly and warm at the same time not make myself look like a wannabe bitch.

I really wish time teaches me how to talk. And behave myself. And conduct myself properly, so that I dont embarrass the ones I represent in society. The beautiful people in my life I cherish should not be lost to me for this...
O God. Please.

Peace.